Moderns that are heating up on ebay! - Page 2189 - Modern

List of all known banned subreddits sorted alphabetically and by reason

Ban/Quarintine Evasion:
Unmoderated:
Violent content:
Harassment:
Prohibited goods or services:
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Minor sexualization:
Spam:
Subreddits banned due to the rule change:
Copyright infringement:
Involuntary pornography:
Glorifying violence:
Inciting harassment:
Doxxing:
Encouraging violence:
Marketplace:
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Safety reasons:
Violence:
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Criminal activity:
Glorifying sexual violence:
Other:
No reason given:
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Wrestling Observer Rewind ★ Apr. 24, 2000

Going through old issues of the Wrestling Observer Newsletter and posting highlights in my own words. For anyone interested, I highly recommend signing up for the actual site at f4wonline and checking out the full archives.
PREVIOUS YEARS ARCHIVE:
199119921993199419951996199719981999
1-3-2000 1-10-2000 1-17-2000 1-24-2000
1-31-2000 2-7-2000 2-14-2000 2-21-2000
2-28-2000 3-6-2000 3-13-2000 3-20-2000
3-27-2000 4-3-2000 4-10-2000 4-17-2000
Happy Halloween, everybody!
  • NJPW wrestler Masakazu Fukuda passed away from complications from a cerebral hemorrhage after collapsing in the ring during a match with Katsuyori Shibata. In the match, Shibata hit him with an elbow drop that he was supposed to kick out of but instead, Fukuda didn't get up and began snoring in the ring, sending officials into a panic and he was immediately rushed to the hospital. Fukuda had a history of brain issues, having suffered a similar cerebral hemorrhage last year, which led to him having brain surgery before recently returning. After being rushed to the hospital, Fukuda underwent a 2nd emergency brain surgery. All of the wrestlers and NJPW staff rushed to the hospital and pretty much the entire company stayed there all night. Shinya Hashimoto, who is off the road due to recently "retiring" heard the news at 11pm that night. He immediately got in his car and drove all night, 6 hours one way to get to the hospital. But Fukuda never regained consciousness and spent nearly 5 days in a coma before ultimately passing away. According to those who saw the match, he didn't take any hard bumps to the head or anything, no worse than any other match. But the word is both Shibata and the referee started to feel something was wrong even before Fukuda collapsed and when he didn't kick out as planned, they immediately ended the match. Tatsumi Fujinami will be a pall bearer at the funeral. It's the 13th known death of a pro wrestler in the last 20 years that happened with a wrestler collapsing during or immediately after a match, the most recent being Gary Albright. Dave recaps Fukuda's career, which isn't much since he was still a NJPW Young Lion who was just beginning. Crazy that this happened in a match with Shibata and then, 17 years later (almost to the day), Shibata is forced to retire due to a similar brain injury.
  • WWF's new TV deal announcement has been delayed because the USA Network has filed a lawsuit against WWF, Viacom, and CBS. This gets complicated so bear with me. Or just skip down to the Mike Awesome story if you want. It's your life man, don't let me tell you how to live it. By the terms of their current agreement, USA has the right to match any offer that WWF gets from another network, which would allow them to keep WWF for another 5 years. Last week, USA announced that it plans to match the offer that CBS/Viacom is making. But here's the catch: USA's right to match the offer only applies to the 4 wrestling shows (Raw, Heat, Superstars, and Livewire). The CBS/Viacom offer is for all of that, plus several other things such as XFL broadcasting rights, a $500,000 movie development fund, a 1-hour weekly drama series on UPN, a publishing joint venture with Simon & Schuster (which Viacom owns), radio specials, hosting theme park events, an equity investment in WWF stock, and more. So basically, the CBS/Viacom offer is for a lot more money, which USA doesn't want to match because they don't want all those other things. USA's lawsuit says "By tying the right of first refusal with respect to the (television series) to rights to different properties that Viacom and CBS wish to exploit. . . the 'offer' represents a transparent and unlawful attempt by WWFE, Viacom and CBS to frustrate USA's contractual rights." USA has been publicly preparing itself to lose WWF and even when they do, they will still remain the top rated cable network. But it's thought that USA may just be filing this lawsuit in order to throw a wrench into the CBS/Viacom deal. Time is ticking because fall season TV advertising sales will be starting soon and WWF and CBS/Viacom need to get this deal finalized so they can start selling ad-space. By stalling the deal at the last minute, USA might just be angling for a big cash settlement to make the lawsuit go away. Either way, doesn't sound like USA is particularly thrilled about losing WWF.
  • The situation with Mike Awesome and the ECW title took a bunch of crazy twists and turns this week and ended with a WCW wrestler facing a WWF wrestler for the ECW title in an ECW ring. As mentioned last week, ECW and WCW initially came to an agreement where WCW would pay ECW a 6-figure settlement in order to get Awesome released from his contract and there were several stipulations WCW had to follow in order for Awesome to appear on Nitro (such as him not bringing the ECW title on TV with him), and things he would do and say and what the announcers would do and say. But according to ECW, 2 of the stipulations were violated. When Awesome appeared, the WCW announcers were supposed to say that he is the ECW champion and that he had a title defense scheduled that would air Friday night on TNN. They mentioned he was ECW champion but they never plugged the TNN show. There was exact scripting for what the announcers were supposed to say and Dave has seen it. In fact, it appeared that Scott Hudson began reading from the script as he was supposed to but he was then cut off midway through by Tony Schiavone, and thus never got to the part where they plug the TNN show. Word is that was a purposeful call from someone in WCW, with those in the company saying that there was simply no way WCW was ever going to plug ECW's show on the air, especially not during the first show of the new Bischoff/Russo-era. The other stipulation is that Awesome wasn't supposed to cut a promo, which he did. All of this led to more legal threats the next day which resulted in Awesome being pulled from the Thunder tapings.
  • As for Awesome dropping the title, Heyman came up with the idea of bringing in Tazz as a surprise opponent to win the belt. Heyman called Vince McMahon who accepted the proposal Heyman laid out, which was for Tazz to win the ECW title from Awesome and then drop it a week later at another ECW show to Tommy Dreamer. Heyman even pitched the idea for Perry Saturn to do a run in during the Tazz/Dreamer match so that Tazz (a WWF guy) wouldn't have to lose clean to an ECW guy and Heyman even offered to let WWF use the footage on TV to help further the Tazz/Saturn angle they're doing. No word if that's going to happen but reportedly WWF has no issue with Tazz losing clean to anybody in ECW.
  • Anyway, the Awesome/Tazz match was nothing as a match but the back story is about as crazy as it gets. Awesome showed up to the arena with WCW head of security Doug Dillenger and never went to the ECW locker room due to concerns that he almost certainly wouldn't be welcomed kindly. When Awesome came out, he got a massive "you sold out!" chant, and then Tazz came out to a huge pop, using his full WWF gimmick. WWF music, two Z's in his name, WWF version of his nickname, etc. Tazz beat him in about 1 minute and, without selling the finish at all, Awesome jumped up, climbed over the guardrail and left the building immediately. A lot of people were surprised WCW would agree to allow Awesome to lose to a WWF wrestler, but Heyman pretty much had them by the balls here. Dave doesn't know that it was a great idea. A WWF guy now holds the ECW title, plus Tazz didn't even beat Awesome clean, Dreamer had to help, so it didn't even do a good job of burying Awesome (although that may have been something WCW insisted on). Anyway, when the match aired on TNN 2 nights later, all the internet buzz and hype didn't amount to shit in the ratings, as the show did about the same rating it's been averaging for months.
WATCH: WCW's Mike Awesome faces WWF's Tazz in an ECW ring for the ECW championship
  • The same night the match happened, Tazz was on the pre-taped Smackdown show getting beat by Crash Holly. Then he jobbed to Eddie Guerrero at multiple house shows (in New York and Pittsburgh, 2 big ECW cities) in opening matches. This week, Tazz came out with the ECW title on Raw, while J.R. explained it by saying he won it "on his day off" and never mentioned Mike Awesome. Tazz then lost a match on Raw (although he wasn't pinned). But then, the big kicker: Smackdown, in a champion vs. champion match, in Philadelphia no less, Tazz jobbed to Triple H. Not only that, Triple H broke Tazz's submission and won even with Tommy Dreamer coming out to try to help Tazz, pedigreeing them both (in the years since, even Vince has kinda half-way apologized for that one). Yes, ECW got lots of national TV exposure this week but at what cost? WWF portrayed the ECW title as not even on par with their joke of a hardcore title and then had Triple H absolutely bury Tazz and the ECW title in general on Smackdown. Tazz will eventually drop the belt, and it will probably never be acknowledged on WWF TV, and Dreamer is not expected to ever return to WWF to get revenge on Triple H, so pretty much nobody from ECW came out ahead here. It's expected that Dreamer will win the title, only because he's the most loyal guy Heyman has and he can trust him not to fuck over the company and jump ship like Awesome did. Dave says it reminds him of the last years of AWA, when all the champions kept getting swooped up by WWF and eventually they put the title on Larry Zbyszko (who nobody bought as a world champion) simply because he was Verne Gagne's son-in-law and they trusted him not to leave. In Dave's opinion, this whole debacle has positioned ECW in the eyes of fans as a second-rate promotion who's stars aren't even remotely on the same level as WWF stars. And perception is important. Nobody wants to feel like they're watching the minor leagues of anything.
WATCH: ECW champion Tazz vs. WWF champion Triple H
  • Spring Stampede, the first PPV under the Bischoff/Russo regime, is in the books and it wasn't bad. In fact, it was probably the best WCW PPV in about a year, but that's still not saying much. Since they're still in the reboot phase, the show featured a ton of angles to make sure the New Blood group got over as heels, with the heels winning every vacated title. The matches were mostly bad and there were tons of screwjob finishes, but since they're starting fresh, Dave is willing to excuse that for now, since they're trying to build brand new storylines and it's kind of necessary. A lot of it felt like a 2nd rate WWF imitation. There was a ton of swearing, even by the announcers, and that felt forced and reportedly the announcers weren't super comfortable with it either.
  • Other notes from the PPV: Chicago radio DJ Mancow had a match with Jimmy Hart and considering he's unknown to most of the country and the match was never hyped on TV, imagine the confusion for fans watching this on PPV. It should have been a dark match for the live crowd only. Jimmy Hart played a heel in the match, despite being a babyface and Hogan's manager all the other time. "I've seen worse celebrity matches, which is about the nicest thing I can say about this one." Mike Awesome made his in-ring debut and was fine but not great, and the crowd chanted ECW at him, but WCW never acknowledged his ECW ties. Hogan got his heat back by beating the shit out of Kidman "to the point because of the size difference and the manner it was done, it actually looked like child abuse." Then Hogan went after Bischoff in the locker room, but Russo brought out cops who actually pulled guns on Hogan and arrested him. Terry Funk took a bunch of chairshots to the head from Norman Smiley and Dave doesn't like it and wishes Funk would stop allowing his brains to be smashed to mush. Russo "fired" Dustin Rhodes, saying the only good character he ever had was Goldust and claimed he wrote all the lines for Goldust to say in the first place. Yay 4th wall breaking, a timeless Russo classic. Tammy Sytch debuted, helping Chris Candido win the cruiserweight title. It wasn't caught on camera, but Tammy fell right on her ass on WCW's terrible entrance ramp during her run-in. And of course Jeff Jarrett won the WCW title. If you're wondering about all the signs in the crowd that were promoting DDP's book, well, that wasn't fans. DDP, smart self-promoter that he is, made the signs himself and littered the building with them before the show (always a hustler, that guy).
  • More Hart family drama, as Stampede Wrestling announced they would be running an 85th birthday celebration show for Stu Hart....in conjunction with WWF. The next day, Stu Hart said he wouldn't be attending. Bruce and Ross Hart, who run Stampede, originally wanted to do an Owen Hart tribute show since we're approaching 1 year since his death but sorta masking it as a Stu Hart celebration show, since his birthday is also in May. Bruce contacted Vince McMahon and Jim Ross, asking to use some wrestlers and it was approved by WWF (who were apparently under the impression that it was only a Stu Hart show). Dave says several Hart family members have been in regular contact with WWF including Ellie and Diana, the wives of Jim Neidhart and Davey Boy Smith, who are expected to testify against Owen's wife Martha in her wrongful death lawsuit against WWF. The show comes on a day off for WWF stars so pretty much all the Canadian wrestlers (Jericho, Benoit, Edge, Christian, Test, Venis, etc.) all signed up to go work the show for free, believing everyone was on the same page and that it was all good. But the day after it was announced, Stu Hart said he wouldn't be attending, feeling it was in poor taste. In a Calgary Sun newspaper article, Bret Hart was quoted saying that Stu was unaware that the show had even been planned in his honor. Martha Hart was quoted saying WWF is just trying to score PR points and she won't be involved either. Bruce has been trying to change Stu's mind but no dice. When all of this came to light, many of the WWF wrestlers wanted to pull out. Benoit in particular said he was misled about what the show would be and doesn't want to go anymore. But Vince McMahon won't let any of them back out, saying that unless the show is cancelled, they're already advertised and have to go. As of press time, the show is still scheduled (it ends up not happening).
  • CMLL held its first ever PPV in Mexico this week, headlined by Atlantis vs. Villano III in a mask vs. mask match and it was a pretty amazing show. Dave says it felt like an old school 80s U.S. show, with the crowd hot for every match and most of the matches being really good. And the pop for the finish of the main event was off the charts, given that this was 2 of the most famous masks in Lucha Libre history at stake. Atlantis won and the crowd came unglued and Villano unmasked (yeah the crowd heat in this match is just bonkers). Sangre Azteca took a NASTY bump outside the ring in the opening match that looked like a surefire broken neck when Ricky Marvin failed to catch him, but he was lucky and was okay (I posted the video of the Atlantis/Villano III match one or two issues ago, but here's video of the Azteca bump).
WATCH: Sangre Azteca spikes himself outside the ring (7:52 mark, with replays after)
  • More news on New Jersey attempting to regulate "extreme" wrestling. WWF, WCW, and seemingly ECW will be exempt from the rules because they aren't classified as extreme (even though 90% of the stuff in the bill, such as blading, barbed wire, etc. have been used in those companies regularly, although you can't expect stuffy politicians to actually grasp the nuances of what they're voting on). A lot of this stems from indie company Jersey All Pro Wrestling which runs death matches regularly. It was made even worse this week when a female JAPW wrestler was seriously injured in a match, fracturing one of her vertebrae. When the media confronted him about it, AJPW president Frank Iadavaia told them that it was angle and that she's fine and she backed it up, claiming she wasn't really hurt. But then the media investigated it deeper and confronted the woman at her home and found out she really is injured with a broken neck and that it's not an angle. She then admitted that she and Iadavaia agreed to lie and tell people it was fake due to the political issues and admitted that, yes, she's really seriously hurt. So yeah, they got busted. Needless to say, this didn't help their case and just strengthened the calls for regulation.
  • The second week of the Bischoff/Russo era did not bring good news in the ratings, as Nitro did its lowest rating since the earliest days of the show back in 1995, doing a 2.47. That's even lower than the lowest rated Kevin Sullivan-booked episode. Can't blame the low rating on Raw either because that show mostly sucked this week. So yeah, looks like they didn't make a very strong first impression last week.
  • XPW held their big show at the LA Sports Arena, drawing 1,200 people. Shane Douglas was there and cut a promo trashing WWF, WCW, and Flair. The crowd chanted "you sold out" because they knew he had returned to WCW. Douglas called XPW owner Rob Black's wife a "porno whore" and slapped her, which led to an angle with Sabu making a surprise appearance, turning the main event into a three way with Sabu, Douglas, and Chris Candido.
  • Sabu was scheduled to work on Insane Clown Posse's upcoming JCW tour as the headline star but Paul Heyman successfully blocked it via legal threats. Sabu DID work XPW's recent show despite Heyman's legal threats and the way they're trying to get around it is by saying that Sabu did the show for free and wasn't paid ("wink wink," Dave adds). Basically, XPW is calling Heyman's bluff on this one (considering Heyman was struggling to keep ECW afloat at this point and XPW was funded by massive amounts of porn money, this was probably a safe bet that Heyman wasn't going to waste resources suing them. Probably the same reason WCW didn't hesitate to steal Mike Awesome, despite a valid contract. ECW was just powerless against people with more money).
  • Lance Storm went on his website this week and basically said the same thing Dave said about the Tazz/Mike Awesome match, that Awesome not losing cleanly and dropping it to a WWF guy didn't help out ECW at all and makes them seem minor league. He got some heat for it in the ECW locker room so he removed the post. Anyway, he's expected to be sitting down with Heyman this week to discuss a contract extension.
  • Notes from Nitro: the show opened with Russo and Jarrett and a bunch of other New Blood guys having a big balloon and confetti celebration, with them cutting a promo trashing Jim Ross, which was lost on 95% of the people watching. Dave thinks Jarrett should probably wait to see if he draws TV ratings or PPV buyrates as champion before he starts talking too much shit (spoiler: no). Then DDP did a run-in and they showed him coming through the backstage area, and showed Curt Hennig and Stasiak going over their match for later that night. Stone Cold Hulk Hogan showed up and the cops tried to keep him at bay but he gave them all a dirty look and they backed down, which leads Dave to quip that he's glad he doesn't live in that city. 800-year-old Terry Funk practically killed himself in a hardcore match to get The Wall over. Brian Adams and Bryan Clark debuted under the team name Kronik. Sting came down from the ceiling for the first time since Owen Hart's death and Dave is appalled that WCW would do that again. Even the NBA banned mascots from being lowered from the ceiling and haven't done it since Owen's death and for WCW, the company that still employees Bret Hart, to do it is absolutely mind-boggling. WCW is running a show in the Kemper Arena in Kansas City soon and Dave just hopes they don't do it again there but who the fuck knows with this company anymore (WWE has still never done it since, in the 21+ years since it happened). DDP faced Mike Awesome and during the match, announcer Mark Madden was going on and on about how this is a new WCW and they will have winners and losers and the refs won't be calling DQs and no contests the way WWF does. Literally seconds later, the DDP/Awesome match ended in a double-DQ. WCW, folks. The show ended with Bret Hart showing up with a chair and swinging it at Hogan and Bischoff, but the show cut to black before you could see who Bret actually hit. Dave thinks it was a decent cliffhanger, but if you're wondering what the live crowd saw....he hit Hogan (of course, Bret was already retired so this led to nothing).
  • Notes from Thunder: David Arquette was on the show to promote the movie and it looks like they're going to do some kind of angle with him in the coming weeks. (...............) Anyway, Dave just trashes this show for not making sense. This is still early on in the new Russo era so there's 500 angles/matches per show thrown at the screen as fast as possible and logic just went out the window. Tag team partners were pinning each other in matches with no explanations given, people were DQ'd in No DQ matches, guys who lost tournament matches still advanced somehow, etc. Just peak WTF-WCW going on at this point.
  • Speaking of David Arquette, Ready To Rumble did $2.68 million in its 2nd week (53% drop from last weekend) and after the first 10 days, it's at around $9 million total and sitting at #10. Not great news (yeah it finishes up as a HUGE financial flop and only made back half of its budget).
  • Eric Bischoff met with MMA fighter Mark Kerr and there are apparently plans to bring him in as part of a group called Fight Club which they also plan to include Mark Coleman, Don Frye, Tank Abbott and....Rick Steiner. Okay then (never happened).
  • Announcer Scott Hudson's father passed away from a heart attack while Hudson was doing Nitro this week. In fact, his parents were watching the show when it happened.
  • Notes from Raw: the show opened with a "Dusty Finish 2000." Jericho seemingly beat Triple H for the WWF title after a fast count from Earl Hebner in a fantastic match. Jericho "winning" the title got a monster pop from the crowd but of course, it was reversed soon after. And of course, Triple H made sure to refer to Jericho as a "sawed off midget" at one point and in the main event later that night, on opposite sides of a tag match, Triple H pinned Jericho clean to make sure nobody gets the crazy idea that Jericho is on his level or anything. God forbid. Also, Kurt Angle did some hilarious skits basically being a nerdy guy preaching abstinence to college kids. Dave thinks it was funny but also feels like Angle has too much star potential to be doing a goofy comedy gimmick.
WATCH: Chris Jericho "defeats" Triple H to win the WWF title - Raw 2000
  • Notes from Smackdown: Tazz came out, wearing the ECW title, to challenge Triple H, which led to Triple H saying that ECW sucked and of course, they had the match later that night and we all know how that went. It's not hard to see how Triple H was beginning to gain a reputation that would haunt him for the next decade.
  • The wrestling restaurant business is not booming. WWF New York is empty most days and they've stopped promoting it on TV and word is they're in the process of revamping their plans for it. WWF is blaming the bad business on the management group they brought in to run it. WCW's Nitro Grill in Las Vegas isn't doing well either, and part of the staff was recently laid off and they stopped serving lunch.
  • Various WWF Notes: depositions in the wrongful death trial for Owen Hart began this week. WWF The Music Vol. 4 recently passed 1 million sales, thus certifying it platinum. Gangrel is out of action for at least a month due to a separated shoulder. Mick Foley will be taping an episode of "Now and Again" on CBS.
  • WWF.com posted an article about the recent Court TV show that focused on deaths of children imitating wrestling moves (in which Linda McMahon was interviewed and came off poorly). WWF claimed the Court TV producers told them the show was about something else and that Linda had not prepared to be asked questions about that topic. Dave says he's done hundreds of media interviews and not once has he ever been given anything more than an occasional broad outline of what might be asked, so he doesn't buy that excuse. WWF also had footage of Linda's full unedited interview with the show, as opposed to the edited footage that aired on Court TV, and they put that online, basically accusing Court TV of editing her comments out of context. Dave thinks the unedited footage actually makes Linda look worse, as she repeatedly tried to dodge questions or change the subject when pressed. There was also the part where Linda claimed WWF doesn't spend a single dime marketing to children, which led to the host pulling out a whole box full of WWF merch from Toys R' Us (action figures and whatnot), and Linda responded by calling them "adult collectibles." They brought up Vince Russo's quote from a couple years ago, saying the WWF motto is to basically do as much as they can get away with. Linda responded saying Russo doesn't work there anymore and insinuated that he was fired for having that kind of attitude, which of course isn't remotely true. Just stuff like that.
FRIDAY: ECW world title situation resolved, more on Masakazu Fukuda's death and calls to regulate wrestling safety, New York senator wants drug testing for wrestlers, and more...
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New Marvel Comics for March 15th, 2017 - Official Discussion Thread [Spoilers]

New Issues Out This Week

Amazing Spider-Man #25 HUGE BLOWOUT ISSUE! STUART IMMONEN (STAR WARS, AVENGERS) takes the artist reins of AMAZING SPIDER-MAN and joins Dan Slott for a 40-page main story! Then don't miss a super-secret short story by Dan and Giuseppe Camuncoli! TOP-SECRET BONUS CREATIVE TEAM!!! Hannah Blumenreich makes hers Marvel, making her Spider-Debut! Cale Atkinson brings another story of the A-May-ZING SPIDER-AUNT!
Black Panther World Of Wakanda #5 DAWN OF THE MIDNIGHT ANGELS: CONCLUSION! Officers. Rebels. Lovers...Ayo and Aneka, a.k.a. the Midnight Angels, now have new monikers thrust upon them: Leaders.
Captain America Sam Wilson #20 'THE END OF THE LINE' is reached, and there's no way out for Sam Wilson, Captain America!
Daredevil #18 NEW STORY ARC 'PURPLE' CONTINUES! Daredevil's identity hasn't always been a secret like it is now. In fact, there's one MAN to thank for that?
Deadpool The Duck #5 Howard and Deadpool have finally learned how to control their shared body! Just in time, too, as they've got an even bigger challenge to face? ?getting their own bodies back! Parental Advisory
Great Lakes Avengers #6 It's the Battle of the Bulge as beautiful bombshell Big Bertha brawls with the bulky baddies of Dr. Nod and the Bod Squad! Can she stop their heinous plot to sell her powers as miracle weight loss supplements? Meanwhile, Doorman goes back to work as an Angel of Death. Hijinks ensue.
Guardians Of the Galaxy #18 Gamora is said to be the most dangerous woman in the galaxy? ?which makes her the most dangerous target S.H.I.E.L.D.'s ever gone after! But she won't be stopped until she gets to Thanos!
Mighty Thor #17 The heavens rumble as the war between Asgard and the Shi'ar tears through space. Meanwhile, the Challenge of the Gods rages on. And though Thor has fought valiantly to protect the people of Midgard, the gods of the Shi'ar have a dark and dangerous surprise in store.
Monsters Unleashed #5 THE FINAL CHAPTER! Up against odds that have never seemed so dire, Marvel heroes like CAPTAIN AMERICA, SPIDER-MAN and MEDUSA will have to lean on their newest and youngest ally to save the day. But what is imagination worth up against several tons of teeth, claws and rage? Well, one LEVIATHON is about to find out. KID KAIJU will have to dig deep into his newfound powers if he wants to save the day - and the Earth with it! The final chapter in an epic story that you won't want to miss, as drawn by comics legend, ADAM KUBERT.
Ms Marvel #16 What started out as a game for Kamala Khan has quickly become Ms. Marvel's worst nightmare The twisted sicko who's been using online games to troll folks has found a way to take control of people IRL With the Doc.X Virus on the loose, can Ms. Marvel trust anyone?
Patsy Walker Aka Hellcat #16 GET DOWN WITH THE SICKNESS! Struck down with a supernaturally awful cold that wreaks havoc all over Brooklyn, Hellcat must rely on her closest and dearest to help put out the (literal) fires AND make soup. Surely, they can handle it... Right? Right, guys? Hello?!
Punisher #10 AGENT OF DESTRUCTION! Agent Ortiz is no longer hunting Frank with the D.E.A. Now, as they say, it's personal. Agent Ortiz is now up against both the Punisher and an entire deadly mercenary outfit. Agent Ortiz might be in trouble. Parental Advisory
Spider-Man #14 'SITTING IN A TREE' PART 5! Someone's stolen a Web-Warriors interdimensional teleporter, and only Miles Morales and Gwen Stacy can get it back! They just need to find whoever took it, first.
Star Wars Poe Dameron #12 Poe is on the run from Terex's forces with only C-3PO and BB-8 to help him! Can the greatest pilot in the galaxy survive without a ship? PLUS: A traitor revealed?
Star-Lord #4 Peter must team up with the Shocker in order find a missing person. But wait?isn't Shocker a bad guy? Guest-starring Daredevil!
Totally Awesome Hulk #17 'BIG APPLE SHOWDOWN' CONTINUES! A tale too big for the Big Apple! Extraterrestrial action how you like it! Hulk and his new friends Ms. Marvel, Silk, Shang Chi, Jimmy Woo and Jake Oh take the fight into space!
US Avengers #4 Do you HATE tie-ins with a fiery passion, True Believer? Well, this isn't one! It's a COMPLETE EPIC EVENT - IN 20 PULSE-POUNDING PAGES! In the wake of Monsters Unleashed - EVEN MORE MONSTERS!! Because you probably will have demanded it! RED HULK! AMERICAN KAIJU! VANDOOM, the man who made a creature! And wouldja believe - DEDD-PUUL, THE MERCENARY THAT WALKS LIKE A MAN?!?
Uncanny Avengers #21 The fight to stop the Red Skull spills out of Avengers Mansion and into the streets. Rogue's gambit works. When the Red Skull gains the upper hand, Deadpool gets help from a few pals. And it's lights out for one Avenger...
Uncanny X-Men #19 When she left the ranks of his X-Men team, PSYLOCKE promised that if MAGNETO stepped out of line, she would end him. And now, in light of the events of INHUMANS VS. X-MEN, Psylocke is going to make good on that promise!
Venom #5 IN THIS CORNER: The scariest symbiotic sociopath this side of the Savage Land! You know him, you love him? The one, the only VENOM! IN THE OTHER CORNER: The wall-crawling, web-slinging wonder called THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN! Step right up and place your bets - the bout of the century is about to begin!

Trades Out This Week

Link MSRP Format
Avengers: The Initiative - The Complete Collection Vol. 1 $34.99 TPB
Deadpool Classic Vol. 17: Headcanon $34.99 TPB
Excalibur Epic Collection: The Sword is Drawn $39.99 TPB
Gwenpool, The Unbelievable Vol. 2: Head of M.O.D.O.K. $17.99 TPB
Wolverine vs. the Marvel Universe $3.99 TPB

Weekly Pull Poll

The results of last week's poll are in. The big winners this week for your Most Anticipated New Release are Uncanny Avengers #21 followed by Amazing Spider-Man #25 and - tied for third - Ms Marvel #16 and USAvengers #4. Please check out next week's poll here to vote on your most anticipated title for next week, 3/22/2017!
General Discussion How much would you say you've spent on comics in your life?
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The Modern Magus’ Magazine .// Notable Servants and You [The RAMPANT VICIOUS Issue]

Guten Abend, fellow Masters.
It is now 10:39 PM, and my desk freezes over once more as it is battered by the chill winds from nearby mountain ranges. For those of you who missed the first few issues, I live in colder climes and have a habit of leaving my windows open. All I’m missing is a goddamn yodel relay chain - technically I DO live on a hill, so that’s something.
Previous Issues can be viewed here for your convenience:
MMM01 .// Inconclusive, Abridged, and Opinionated - Saber Issue
MMM02 .// Obligatory Rider Issue
MMM03 .// The Kojirou Issue: The Saving of France, et al.
Given that the latest server updates are still in (debatable, doubtful) progress, now would be a good time to practice the words of Sasaki Kojirou, the Grand Saviour and Liberator of France - the HARMONIOUS WAY.
”Maintenance is but an Ephemeral State of Swallows.”
Right, you people still with me?
Good. What, practicing the Harmonious Way is difficult because we’ve more or less had more than 24 hours of maintenance at this point?
Well, you have to try. You DO know what happens to people who don’t try, right? Because trust me - you don’t want to end up like them. Unless you DO. In which case, let me welcome you to the next episode of the MMM.
Presenting: The Modern Magus’ Magazine, RAMPANT VICIOUS ISSUE.
UPDATE
This section is now present in all MMMs: Please refer to this post from kairosity for specifics, but the gist is I'm apparently retarded and Anti-Magic is actually debuff resistance, so now I need to go through all the guides and change everything.
Sigh.
Well, at least we know now! TIME TO THROW ALL THOSE PRIMEVAL MAGICKS OUT OF THE WINDOW AYYYYYYYYY
CLASS: BERSERKER
That's RIGHT. FULL CAPS IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR BUSTER BRAVE CHAIN.
Ahem.
Prior to our non-stop maintenance shenanigans, the balance of FGO was, for the lack of a better word, a bloody joke. FGO basically consists of the following flowchart:
  • Do you have Jeanne? (Most people will say "No.")
  • Do you have a Berserker? (Some people can say "Yes.")
  • Is it at least 3 stars? If it is, you're not totally fucked - but only 50% of the time.
Welcome to the flawed world of bad game design and berserking. If i were to describe berserkers, they would all be just a bunch of glass sculptures punching each other with steel knuckles. Now don't ask me how that works - that mental image was conjured for the express purpose of making the reader think of imaginary PAIN.
Berserkers in this game have a very unique (read: stupid) benefit stapled to them by the inept folks at delightworks: They punch everyone twice as hard. In EXCHANGE, everyone punches THEM twice as hard, INCLUSIVE OF CRITICALS.
Do I have your attention yet? Well I hope I do, because a lot of people at this point would be going "Why play berserkers then?! They're bloody terrible!". That is fortunately only half-correct. 50% of the time, Berserkers hold solitary reign over the pseudo-noble phatasm known as the BUSTER BRAVE CHAIN. On proper servants, the legendary BB Chain can decimate anything it touches, especially if Master Skill boosted.
Think Kojirou, but on steroids, with an insatiable lust for yolo.
Congratulations, you have just imagined what the life of a Berserker is like in FGO.
Berserkers come equipped with only one kind of card distribution - the only acceptable kind, really. The divine combination is Q A B B B (unless you are Vlad, then you have my condolences SASAGEYOU SONO CHI, SONO INOCHI WO), and it is very likely (partially) because of this that the game was taken offline to fix balance issues. Does Hercules getting critted for 3k by a wyvern large swallow make any sense to you?
No, no it doesn't. But that's how things are.
As their name suggests, one uses berserkers exclusively to deal huge damage to things, along with very artistic means of forcing them to stay alive - including but not limited to Forced Evasion, actually using St. George to cast Protector Knight, Mashu's Shield Skill, you name it I've seen it. With insanely powerful noble phantasms and damage output that cannot be matched, those of you unfortunate enough to have been forced into a continue will DEFINITELY remember how it felt to maul the offending monster in the face with a fully-charged GOD FORCE.
Honestly, at this point, they should just rename the class Dodger.
Berserker: The Actual Numbers
Credit goes to Kyte of Beast's Lair for datamining these numbers.
Attacke Defende Attacker Base Multiplie Triangle Multiplie Final Damage Multiplier
Saber, Berserker, 1000, 2000, 2000
Archer, Berserker, 950, 2000, 1900
Lancer, Berserker, 1050, 2000, 2100
Rider, Berserker, 1000, 2000, 2000
Caster, Berserker, 900, 2000, 1800
Assassin, Berserker, 900, 2000, 1800
Berserker, Berserker, 1200, 1500, 1800
Shielder, Berserker, 900, 1000, 900
Ruler, Berserker, 1100, 2000, 2200
So yeah, "Balance". Roughly translates to "Get fucked by everything". Thanks, Delightworks.
Berserker: Vlad the Third
Max Stats: HP 13770 ATK 11499
NP: The Bloodstained King of Demons, Kazikli Bey (GAZOOGLY) // Single target damage, obtain large amount of stars. [ARTS]
Skill 1: Vampirism A, decrease enemy gauge, increase own NP
Skill 2: Transformation C, Slightly increases Def for 3 turns.
Skill 3: Battle Continuation A, Revives with set amount of HP once per turn after death. Can still be killed on same turn. HP increases with rank.
Attack Pattern: Lancer
Cards: Q A A B B
In the beginning, there were five star servants.
In the beginning, no one knew about S-type growth curves.
In the beginning, there was...
VLAD WARS
Well, not really, but we've come a long way since "Buster Brave Chain is Cruise Control for Cool". Vlad now has the honour of being THE first arts-based berserker there was, and the world is much better for it.
Back when the game was still unbalanced and I wasn't as enlightened, we all thought that BBB was the end-all be all to everything. We didn't take into account Vlad's SABER-esq balanced card layout, the value of his arts chaining, and how even GAZOOGLY GHEY can be used to artschain. We didn't think about how Tamamog would eventually be released, giving vlad a buff that could make him gazoogly the goddamn moon if he wanted to, and gain enough arts again to use it next turn.
We also had no idea about things like maxed out dragon pulses and 75% Hollow Magic CEs. In short, we were young, and somewhat stupid. However, Uncle VlatTM was wise. He waited for the correct time, until everyone had their 5-stars past the level 60 mark... And then he started to scale.
And before you knew it, you started hearing Vlad's lines everywhere you went.
SASAGEYOU SONO CHI
SONO INOCHI WO
What do you mean, it's only me? I'm pretty sure everyone hears it too. I mean come on - he fucking says it all the time. If it hasn't been obvious enough, Vlad is an amazing servant - Berserkers like Vlad can be viewed as "Technical" berserkers - I have lost track of the amount of times a master buffed vlad could BB a golden hand, Gazoogly a hand, and kill the last one with an extra. Farming time optimization HOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Of course, everyone talks about Kaleidoscope and vampirism, or Hollow Magic and vampirism. How about 50% dragon pulse and vampirism + artschains? Or 50% DP and Tamamog's Suiten Nikkou?
It is worth noting that Vlad's stats only become awesome near the 70 ranges - he grows the most from 70 to 80, and then gains 200 attack between 80 to 90 because of growth rates. Go figure. Most people by now have already realized that vlad is amazing - Battle continution to stay alive, Vampirism to charge NP, and even Transformation plays a part - as berserkers generate quite a lot of NP when being hit, being mauled by multi-hit attacks with defense on can help them survive it AND build NP. If he DIES, there's always continuation to save the day.
There's not much else to say here other than the fact that vlad has a still-unreleased interlude, which sees Gazoogly's base damage jump from 600% to 700%.
So, until said interlude comes out, LET'S SASAGEYOU. sonochisonoinochiwoooooooo
Berserker: Sakata Kintoki
Max Stats: HP 12150 ATK 12712
NP: Golden Impact, Golden Spark // Single target damage. Medium chance of stun. Overcharge increases chance/ [BUSTER]
Skill 1: Monstrous Strength C, Attack + for 1 turn.
Skill 2: Animal Conversation C, Increase self NP Gauge.
Skill 3: Divine Body C, Increase self resistance to attack debuffs, heals self for fixed amount. (Probably 1600)
Attack Pattern: Berserker (Probably)
Cards: Q A B B B
Kintoki, AKA that one guy who always makes people go "Who?" was originally a servant who featured in Fate/Apocrypha when it was still designed to be an online game of sorts. Apocrypha went on to become a novel if memory serves, and the game is what FGO is today. With a Divinity of D, but Mad Enhancement of E, Kintoki is supposedly some half-breed Oni/ Mountain God who is obsessed with all things Golden, which explains his choice of fashion and dress sense.
A focused damage berserker, Kintoki's stats outweigh that of Heracles', coming in with an ATK of 12712. Kintoki's abilities are mostly kind of odd, with a mix of a one-turn attack buff, a self-heal, and a rare self-NP gauge increase. Given that Vlad's vampirism grants him 20% whether it hits or not, I suppose I'll have to see exactly how much NP talking to animals gives.
Coming with a standard Q A B B B also helps - if Lu Bu were Herakles Lite, this guy is probably Herakles Plus. Granted, Divinity D isn't as potent as divinity A, and I'm not quite sure how hard Golden Spark hits for - the Stun is quite interesting, however, and should go off more frequently than God Force given that it has a medium chance.
Update: Nov 15, the field tests are out and the results are in: Kin-tooky basically punches things, and they die. Golden Spark hits things, and they explode. Animal Conversation has turned out to be surprisingly useful for cost-saving - a maxed out Hollow Magic, or in some cases even a Dpulse can go a long way to freeing up cost for use on other areas. As far as Kin-tooky is concerned: his purpose to break things as hard as he can remains unchanged. If anything, we just not know that he does it very well, although he is prone to exploding due to a lack of defensive skills.
Berserker: Lancelot
Max Stats: HP 10318 ATK 10468
NP: A Knight Does Not Die with Empty Hands, Knight of Honour // AOE damage, increases self ATK for 3 turns. Overcharge increases ATK value. [QUICK]
Skill 1: Eternal Arms Mastership A, Grants Focus status for 3 turns.
Skill 2: Protection of Faeries A, Increase self Star generation for 3 turns.
Attack Pattern: Berserker
Cards: Q A B B B
Update: lxlanayalxl has raised his concerns about Lancelot in his post here, detailing why he is a risky choice. While I don't necessarily agree with all that is being said there, it is a detailed post, and interested parties can have a look at it so they can make a more informed choice. I view Lancelot as a berserker that works with other star-focused servants - it is advised that readers take this into account as they read the analysis below.
Everyone's favourite Mad Dog Black Knight is back, sporting a Mad Enhancement of C and a paltry E in Anti-Magic. Lancelot was one of the many enemy servants featured in France, and while some players have had the (mis?)fortune of encountering his machine guns, I actually fought Lancelot too long ago to even remember how he attacked - to give you an idea, I fought Lancelot before I started this series.
With that being said, Lancelot is pretty awesome for a 4 star, with well-balanced stats and very useful skills at his disposal. At the time of writing Lancelot is THE only berserker servant with a Focus skill and an ability to increase self star generation - if you slap a stargen CE on him this effectively causes Lancelot to become a pseudo-assassin who punches you in the face... or shoots you with machine guns. I don't know. Either way, this skill has great synergy with servants who generate stars (assassins), or servants who have skills that generate stars (assassin and saber).
If you are the kind of player that enjoys progressively making things more terrifying (or terrible, depending on who you ask), you could even slap a Crit Dmg + CE on Lancelot to make him hit crazy numbers, and laugh while doing the above.
Interestingly, Lancelot works very well with servants that generate stars with their NP, such as Vlad (15 via Kazikli Bey, often on turn 1), and Atalanta, who also has Focus and can generate stars with her AOE Phoibos Catastrophe. It is perhaps because of this odd obsession with stars that has caused Lancelot's NP to become a Quick one as well - at a glance this is underwhelming, but the hidden value of this is that Knight of Honour is a SETUP Noble Phantasm.
Think about it: A quick chain (not even Quick brave, although that is the best scenario) will grant you 10 stars before anything is even done. It is safe to assume that Lancelot with Mastership active will be able to generate at least 8~10 more stars once the chain is done (with the other parts of the chain supplemented by other people as Lancelot can't Quick Brave), leading to a net amount of roughly 20 stars next turn.
This is effectively 20 X 11%, which is 220% Crit distributed across 5 stars. Granted, if the system doesn't DRAW any lancelot cards next turn, you're screwed, but perhaps this is why servants with Focus tend to work well with each other. Imagine granting that 220% to an Archer, like Gilgamesh or Atalanta, who both have Focus and Indpendent Action - 220% crit divided over 2~3 cards. If you manage to pull 3 Gilgamesh or Atalanta cards, that is also a high-chance crit brave chain.
Talk about arithmetical power - and here I thought all Lancelot did was scream at people from behind his funny black helmet. He may have an excel spreadsheet in there - who knows?
With reference to the points raised by u/lxlanayalxl, fielding Lancelot would mean that you would have to support him with other Star-gen servants. Although his B B B cardpool can cause the deck to become lopsided, I feel that the busters are required to take advantage of the crit stars after they have been generated. If we have a sample PT of Hassan (Q Q Q A B), Atalanta (Q Q A A B) and Lancelot (Q A B B B), that would give us a total of 6 Q, 4 A, 5 B. That's a 40% chance of pulling Quick a 26.66% of pulling Arts, and a 33.33% chance of pulling a Buster card per draw, with 5 cards drawn per turn.
Realistically these numbers don't exactly mean you'd get a Quick chain (Or a buster chain, or having a quick in ther at all for the matter) all the time - I've run triple zerker parties and gotten Q and A in various places although I've had 60% chance of drawing a buster in each of my draws. Interestingly, if you field Lancelot with Vlad, Kazikli Bey generates 15 stars before anything else, and you may actually get some mileage from vacuuming up said stars with Focus next turn.
Lancelot is, for all intents and purposes, a really solid choice for a berserker slot in the party, assuming that the party is built around him. He isn't a general-use berserker, unlike Tamamog or Herakles. He does have the potential to hit bullshit numbers on a semi-regular basis, however, assuming that he doesn't get killed in the process. If anyone ever manages to field a Vlad/ Lancelot/ Gilgamesh party, please take a video of it with the appropriate commentary. I'd really like to see all this star-based violence in action.
Berserker: TamamoCAT
Max Stats: HP 11458 ATK 9026
NP: SANSANNIKKOUHIRUYASUMISHUCHINIKURIN, aka Bright Sunlit Nap, Palace Banquet // AOE, Self-Heal for 3 Turns, Self-Stun for 2 turns [QUICK]
Skill 1: Monstrous Strength B, Attack + for 2 turns.
Skill 2: Curses Techniques E // Low chance of lowering Enemy Gauge.
Skill 3: Transformation B // Raises self DEF for 3 turns. (This is a great skill on a Berserker, Kiyohime's C already provides quite some mileage.)
Attack Pattern: Rider (Aww yeah Tamamog)
Cards: Q A B B B
Born from one of the nine Tails of Tamamo-No-Mae after she unceremoniously disposed of them into the abyss, TamamoCAT is the crystallization of Tamamo's more sincere aspects. She's so sincere and honest that she will really just punch you in the face with a Buster, twice. Welcome to the world of Tamamog.
Some people have been asking me why I call TamamoCAT Tamamog. The reason is simple - Mog is a cat that has been immortalized in a series of children's books. Tamamocat is a... cat fox. Hence, Tamamog. It's easier to type, and is really just shorthand. Moving on with the actual content now, we have a few things that jump out at us right away:
Tamamog is unique in that she has a Rider attack pattern, as a BERSERKER. While I did not exactly whip out my calculator and COUNT, this means that Tamamog's Buster card consists of TWO swings. I common see figures of "3.8, 1.8" on a buster swing, and although a solid 5k from Lu Bu is very satisfying, there's something terrifying about a crazy kimono cat punching you for almost 6k damage while saying catty lines in a catty way.
While one may raise the question of why Tamamog talks, the answer is apparently because she only has a C in Mad enhancement. While it is true that Tamamog's attack stat is actually hideously low for a berseker, to instantly write off out catty friend is a silly mistake. Few people realize that very little Berserkers (in fact, none at all I think) can self-heal: Tamamog does exactly that. If paired with Jeanne, she can effectively self-repair at the cost of she and Jeanne not doing anything for two turns. Resultant damage from the non-invicible turn will be outhealed by Sunny Nap and Luminoshte Eternelle - Tamamog effectively pulls a goddamn Doctor Who and regenerates before your eyes. Much like the Doctor, our Cat Friend also shoots lasers before regenerating - the NP damage is nothing to sneeze at as it still counts as a WEAK hit.
Since Sunny nap is a Quick NP, it CAN be used to generate stars if your party is aiming to crit in Tamamog's absence. While her stun is regrettable, I suppose the damage that berserkers take in general will be reduced after the update, bringing up the possibility that she can outheal the damage, especially if she is equipped with weakness reduction CEs - the 4star one gives 25% weakness reduction and HP increase. although with the update on what those CEs actually are, I'd say go for an offense or DEF one. Maybe just one that updates her buster power because Delightworks hates berserkers.
It is possible to view Tamamog as a sort of Agile Berserker - an angry monk-type character if you will. It is possible to pop Reconstruction on the turn that you use Sunny nap - it'll significantly reduce incoming damage, and Tamamog will be refreshed and ready to go after 2 turns of being asleep. Assuming that Curse Mastery actually does something, Tamamog has the potential to become a versatile, even persistent Berserker who tries pretty hard not to die - and succeeds.
If everything else fails, there's always the apron and her multitude of knives. Oh, she gets a ladle in her final evolution stage.
Berserker: HERACLES
Max Stats: HP 10327 ATK 10655
NP: Nine Lives // Single target damage, Def debuff for 3 turns. [BUSTER]
Skill 1: Ferocity A+, Attack + for 3 turns, Mental Debuff resistance +
Skill 2: Mind's Eye (False) B, Dodge for 1 turn, defense + for 3 turns. He's like Kojirou Hulk.
Skill 3: Battle Continuation A, UPDATE: Apparently only revives him with X amount of HP after death.
Attack Pattern: Berserker
Mad Enhancement B, Divinity A.
Q A B B B setup with battle continuation, a Buster NP, Mind's eye, and Ferocity A+.
Seriously.
Like, really. What do you want me to say?
HERACLES IS THE MOTHERFUCKING BRINGER OF PAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIINNNNNNNNNNN!!!
Something to that effect? Well, that's because THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT HE BLOODY IS. Heracles is flat-out SCARY, even MESSED UP. If you thought Kojirou saving France was amazing, Heracles probably bench-presses France while saving the goddamn CONTINENT. I'd say world - but that's Atlas' job.
I have had the good fortune of having Heracles in my support slot just ONCE. Just ONCE. The combined damage buff from Divinity, Berserker class advantage, Ferocity, BBB and the Temporary Strengthen master skill caused a simple Buster Brave Chain to break over 25k in damage. I just stopped counting I think - I've seen high leveled Hercules swing for about 60k with Nine Lives in the chain.
And if you think he's dead... Well, he's not really dead. Thanks to Battle Continuation, he will continue to live on, UNDYING (revived after he dies once, at least. Not sure if number increases with rank), AND MACING YOUR FACE, FOR AT LEAST THREE TURNS. The BEST PART of all this is that he is FOUR STAR! You see why people say Vlad is terrible now? I mean, with people like Heracles around, it's hard to live up to these impossible standards, yeah?
Give us a break, Greek God guy.
Berserker: LU BU FENG XIAN
Max Stats: HP 8302 ATK 8119
NP: Five Soldiers of the War God, GOD FORCE // Single Target damage, low chance to stun (and if it stuns it is fucking glorious) [BUSTER]
Skill 1: Ferocity B+, Attack + for 3 turns, Mental Debuff resistance +
Skill 2: Image of Betrayal B: Incease self defense for 3 turns, Attack buffs have a chance to fail for 3 turns. (If you use the buff first, Image of Betrayal does not erase it.)
Attack Pattern: Berserker
Cards: Q A B B B
Lu Bu Feng Xian. Brother (somewhat traitorous but...). Soldier. General. War God. GOD FORCE.
Lu Bu is basically Delightwork's way of being a non-shitty company. For those who did not have the good fortune of rolling Heracles, Lu Bu is Heracles Lite. Almost like the real thing, but with enough removed to make you angry.
In fact, it makes you SO ANGRY, that you feel a compelling DESIRE to utilize GOD FORCE. Do you know how satisfying it is when God Force stuns a troublesome boss? That's me right there, fighting Jeanne Orta. With only Lu Bu left because everyone else is dead - yes, even Jeanne. And then. And then.
GOD FORCE STUNS.
In that one single moment in time, my triumphant cry of "HA! GOTCHA BIIIIIIIIITCCCH!" was so loud, my neighbour's lights came on.
It was 2AM. But enough of that.
Famously remembered as a character in the Three Kingdoms, Lu Bu was a relatively backstabby kinda guy who stabbed his foster father twice. Or was it two foster fathers one time each? No matter, thing is, Lu Bu was awesome in life. He's still kinda awesome here, but because he's not quite the Lamborghini that Heracles is, we actually have to put in some effort as opposed to facerolling. Mashu's shield, Emergency Evasion, and Jeanne are all good friends to Lu Bu - keeping him alive will cause him to re-enact the legendary BBB Buster Brave Chain, commonly dealing close to 19k damage with Ferocity active.
The main reason I chose Lu Bu over Darius III was simply because of the NP: Atanatos Ten Thousand is an AOE sweep with Def down, but Lu Bu simply shoots some idiot with his bow and they FUCKING DIE most of the time.
What's there NOT to love about that?
Being 3 star, his cost is lower, he costs less to feed, he has Mad Enhancement A, and he's cheaper to fuse copies of himself when it comes to making GOD FORCE even more GODLY. Seriously, pick up Lu Bu and go stir up Big Trouble in Little China.
He deserves that much, you know.
Berserker: Kiyohime
Max Stats: HP 9166 ATK 6644
NP: Tenshin Kasyou Zanmai, Achieving Acala's Samadhi (Thanks Beast Lair, that shit was impossible to read) // AOE damage, low chance to stun, Burns (300 DOT) for 3 turns. [BUSTER]
Skill 1: Transformation C, Def+ for 3 Turns
Skill 2: Stalking B, Single target DEF- for 3 turns, but increases its ATK for 3 turns. (Probably upset by stalking)
Attack Pattern: Caster. Yes. Caster.
Cards: Q A B B B
Tamamo once said in Fate/ Extra that she had an e-mail friend whose idea of dealing with rivals in love was to trap them in a bell and set the bell on fire. This e-mail friend is none other than our very own Kiyohime, who is so fucking angry that her mind has permanently snapped and she has attained some sort of permanent rage-transcendence.
Although she was supposed to be a caster, her actions in life and her eternal rage cause her to be in a constant state of rage, putting the Angry Marines to shame. Possessing really TERRIBLE stats, Kiyohime's saving grace is the fact that she retains the ability to talk WHILE possessing Mad Enhancement EX, and the strange ability to attack like a caster although she's angry enough to punch eagles out of the sky - but she's too ladylike for that sort of thing, so she'll probably stalk it and hard boil its eggs for breakfast or something, I don't know.
Posessing a rare defensive skill that can be used off the bat, Kiyohime is an oddball servant - she's almost a utility berserker, if such a thing is even possible. Her noble phatasm is like God Force VER. AOE with Fire, and her EX attacks chain like that of a caster's. It is however somewhat unfortunate to note that her stats are lower than the other berserkers, and having her in a party is really 50% entertainment, 50% respect for stalking.
She isn't bad per se, being a little more difficult to kill as compared to, say, Lu Bu. Kiyohime is able to go out in a blaze of glory if she is used in a kamikaze attack with low HP - the DOT and chance to stun makes up for the lack of focus.
If it helps, she also talks quite a bit and threatens to kill you if you ever lie to her.
Don't ever feed Kiyohime to another Servant. She will haunt your rolls forever.
Forever.
Berserker: Darius III
Max Stats: HP 8763 ATK 7608
NP: The Undying Army of Ten Thousand, ATANATOI TEN THOUSAND // AOE damage, ATK & Def debuff 3 turns. [BUSTER] (I may be wrong on this one, I can't quite remember)
Skill 1: Golden Requiem B, Increases NP Gain for 3 turns.
Skill 2: Battle Reset A, removes debuffs from self, and heals self for a set amount. Amount healed increases with rank.
Skill 3: Battle Continuation A, UPDATE: Apparently only revives him with X amount of HP after death.
Attack Pattern:
Cards: Q A B B B
Darius the III, IE pretty angry guy with a mammoth and a room full of dead guys who want to maul your face. Apparently has some beef with Leonidas, but is not mad enough because he can still appreciate his bling to increase his NP gauge.
With a Mad Enhancement rating of B and an AOE + status NP, Darius III is really not my choice when it comes to berserkers. While it is true that he looks imposing and seems somewhat scary, Darius has a low attack stat compared to Lu Bu. Although he DOES have a bit more hp (400 odd), what is 400 odd HP to a berseker? Fuyuki SKELETONS PUNCH YOU FOR 350! YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALIIIIIIIIDDDDDDDDDDD
Ahem.
Darius isn't bad by any means, if paired with Ushiwakamaru or Saber, he can be used to consistently hit numbers and with some luck, use his NP faster than a damage-dedicated servant would be able to do so. Atanatoi Ten Thousand does acceptable damage and the defense debuff helps, as the debuff actually lasts. If you equip Darius with KALEIDOSCOPE, however, the whole fucking game changes.
You see, Darius has Golden Requiem. If you pull off a single Arts chain, as unlikely as it is, Darius can fire Atanatoi on turn 2, leading to an instant debuff. This should outright CRIPPLE enemies, and if you stack it with Tengu's Tactics, it is possible for Darius to cast Atanatoi AGAIN immediately after the first one wears off. This is a pretty niche function and requires a bit of set up and protection (so he doesn't just up and die) to pull off, but it's effective if done properly. Granted, Darius is a three star, so stapling mutliple copies of Atanatoi Ten Thousand together should be pretty doable.
He isn't my first choice, but he doesn't make the shit list. Good on you, big black golden bling man thing.
Berserker - Special Case
Spartacus
Now, I'm not even sure if Spartacus should be in the "avoid" section, so he gets his own section. Spartacus is a berserker, but he talks. He doesn't just talk, he talks about ACCEPTANCE AND LOVE. While in his METAL THUNDER UNDERPANTS. That's not all, his core skill enables him to regenerate HP for 3 turns. Yes, you didn't read that wrong. He really does that. If not for the fact that he was a one star with 5000 attack at the cap, he could really have some serious mileage. I suppose you could view Spartacus as a sort of berserker-Kojirou, he's easy to raise, his NP ignores enemy defense, deals ok damage, and HEALS HIM. For quite a LOT. Guy is basically fucking He-man - I don't know how to feel about Spartacus. It probably wouldn't do you much harm to try him out - and be amused by his strange quotes... and metal thunder underpants. Yeah. Stuff.
Berserkers to Avoid
Erik Bloodaxe
You know, I personally have nothing against viking-esq people with axes, but an attack stat cap of 6290 is trash. His curse support skill also decreases the ATK and DEF of a single enemy by two turns, but last I checked we were playing the Berserker game, and we were supposed to beat the living daylights out of people. Def down can be achieved with Kiyohime's NP - leave this viking on his longboat and go home.
Caligula
Caligula's core skill is "Masochistic Tendency". I'm serious. He decreases his defense to pump his attack. For three turns. Are you fucking serious? If this DOESN'T kill him and he lives long enough, however, he can use his NP, which has a high chance of sealing the skills and NPs of enemies for three turns. While this sounds pretty cool on paper, you need to remember that berserkers are already made of wet toilet paper, if wet toilet paper could hold sharpened implements of all shapes and sizes. Caligula is a mixed bag, and I don't know what his other skills do, so I can't really recommend him to anyone. And yes, that skill really annoys me. You don't see Lu Bu becoming less awesome just to punch people harder. HE SIMPLY DECIDES TO PUNCH PEOPLE HARDER. As it should be.
Asterios
Good core skill, crappy stats (6k ATK cap) and bad Status NP (no damage). All enemies ATK and DEF down for 6 turns sounds good on paper, but can this ox-headed moron even survive 6 turns? Bet you a 3-star all class EXP card he won't. Spoilers: he won't.
Conclusion: The Class in General
As of the time of writing, the concept of BALANCE is notably nonexistent in the minds of Delightworks. The Berserker scene is basically all about who can continue standing and hitting people on the head - much like an ill-advised drinking competition that almost always evolves into a fatal bar brawl.
The few berserkers who are "Good" will always remain "Good", and the two "economy" options will always remain respectable. If Delightworks changes class balance and mechanics this whole article may be invalidated, but I really doubt that they would make such a drastic change. If you're too lazy to raise a caster to use in Rome, just bring Heracles or Lu Bu along and bop stuff on the head - before they bop you on the head anyway.
The next issue... you know, my mind is too fried to think of the next issue, so here's a silly song to end the article instead:
The Freshzerker of Orleans
Innnnnnn West Fuyuki Gacha'd and Raised
Crushin' skeletons was how I spent muh days
Roaring, smashing, Buster Brave Chain all Cool
Soloin' some Ortas after tutorial school
When one day some Mashus, they were up to no good
Started goin MYNAME-LV1 in the neighbourhood
I got one little MYNAME in support and my master got scared
She said:
"You're movin' with your Kojirou and Saint Graphs to Or-leans."
Yeah. And that was my sign-off.
submitted by Atelier-Lynette to grandorder [link] [comments]

10) Banner/Savage Hulk 11) Amadeus Cho/Totally Awesome Hulk 12) Rick Jones/A-Bomb I'm now betting, with the Hulk Mastermind, we get Strange and Black Bolt Heroes to fill out an anti-Hulk team, rather than Elloe and Hiroim. HOPING the 15th is Betty/Red-She Hulk, but I'd settle for Skaar. When you begin playing online slots, pick a portfolio of games, 3 to five, and stick to them. Select one that has desirable totally free spins perks, one progressive prize, one with a lot of Wilds like Sticky and Expanding Wilds, and another low-variance game. By rotating play in between the games, you'll get a much better feel of the numerous Am, and always will be a Marvel fan mostly because of The Hulk, X-Men, and Spider Man. Loved Supes and Justice League when I was a kid though. Marvel was great until Stan Lee sold the company. The whole diversity virus infected great characters like the Hulk and demands for Captain America to be outed as gay. This one is basically Round 1, but worse. A single hit from WBH will rock Superman's world, since he can destroy entire planets as side-effects of engaging in a fight. Round 6:Hulk, (Ultimate Universe) VS Post Crisis Superman. If Blue Marvel can take down Ult-Hulk then i'm betting Superman can easily do the same. Odinson vs Totally Awesome Hulk in INCREDIBLE HULK #711 and MIGHTY THOR #702 If I had to guess we should be getting the first two but the fight is bound to piss off one fanbase and I'm betting

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